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Hope Your Valentine's Day Was a Success Otherwise it Was Nice Knowing You

We have all year to plan for Valentine's Day yet, in the last moment, there are hundreds of men who pack the aisle of picked over cards and beat up heart shaped mediocre chocolates.

 

I do this every year. I normally write something about it a couple of days before Valentine's Day, but this year you guys were on your own.

Around 4 p.m. Valentine's Day, I went to the Kroger supermarket especially to see the "Aisle of the Damned." Sure enough, there they were, picking through the pitiful leftover Valentine's Day cards passed over by dozens who passed down the aisle days before.There were at least a dozen of them, not speaking, but sifting through the mostly empty racks.

Those who managed to find a card, had little luck finding a matching envelope. With no time to spare, they moved over to the leftover chocolate boxes and roses and other flowers that looked like they were on fumes. 

You guys had all year to plan for this. If you gave your wife, girlfriend, or both, the standard heart shaped chocolate box and the overlooked cheesy card and a rose with half the pedals missing, well, she'll know. She'll know you spent exactly 15 minutes at the "Aisle of the Damned" and believe me, you will pay.

It will be subtle at first. She won't make it too obvious but remember that sooner or later you'll have to go to sleep and she'll be lying there, in bed, looking at you. She won't be smiling...but she will be looking at you....and plotting.

Good luck.

This post is contributed by a community member. The views expressed in this blog are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect those of Patch Media Corporation. Everyone is welcome to submit a post to Patch. If you'd like to post a blog, go here to get started.

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